The start of another Journey

Here it is 10:30 the night before a very important trip to U of M hospital. A trip that will hopefully reveal to Dr.'s what they can do to help Kasi live. Yep, I said live, because they way she is right now is not really living. We have been down many roads together and this is a start of yet another journey in her life, and a Journey In Faith.
Right now I am anticipating the things I always do, seeing her lie on the bed, laughing instead of crying. This is because we are very funny people :-) And those of you that know us well, know that we do truly laugh at life. I tell the girls it is a way I can extend their life. We do have fun together. All of that will run through my head and I will then look at her and see a brief tear in her eye through all of mine and give her a kiss and start (continue) to pray for God's hand to go in with her. How silly it must seem to our King that I ask Him and tell Him what I think would be best for her. I long for the day that she can be free from all of this "stuff" and live a normal life as a teenager now. I have said that prayer from birth each time she hits a new milestone of life I thank God for her and praise Him for what He has done for her. As I sit here I wasn't going to write because I felt like "this is sooo not fair" and "why does this always have to be her". Then I think, why not? God will NOT give her or me anymore than we can handle. This is a promise from our Creator. I will live into that promise and we will march forward declaring His goodness of the past and His promise to always love us. He holds her so close, it makes my heart so happy for her. I know God's love for her is so amazing because I have seen the change in her, at times almost like Moses when his face shown because He was in God's presence. I know she doesn't realize it, but it does give me comfort.
So, tomorrow, we will take her in to have another heart cath/angiogram done and pray that it will reveal a way to "fix" her. A way to give her life that she can actually live. We will pray for her safety as this procedure does hold new risks because of how many times she has had this done in the past. We will pray for peace for her heart and mine. We will pray for Ben, yep Ben who has had to have ice cream with the whole family tonight, had to go swimming with the family, and just be with the family tonight. He also asks to see Kasi tomorrow at the hospital, just because he "needs to be with her". His passion for his sister and his wanting to protect her is amazing. I love, love, LOVE to watch my kids together. They truly are a blessing, all of them. I pray that this is the final journey in which we have to travel. I pray we learn all that there is to learn to make us even stronger in Him. I pray that God will get ALL the Glory for the great things He has done and is about to do.
Love to you all,
I will update this tomorrow!
Jodi
One more thing. Please pray for my heart too. This is extremely hard road and knowing what is to come is crazy hard. I am up for any verse that you might have for us.....I know I got one from a dear friend. Be strong and courageous do not be terrified for the Lord YOUR God goes with you where ever you go.....now I will go to sleep singing that song.