It is hard to believe that prom is this week Friday. Along with prom, it is also Kasi's 17th birthday. I can hardly believe that she has made it this far in her life. I never thought at the begining of her life she would be going to prom, nor did I ever even think about it. It was such a day by day, moment by moment life. Now as I look back I see all of the goodness to us and the provision and can celebrate with her as I send her off in her beautiful dress on her 17th birthday.
April 12, 1996 at 7:58pm a little bundle of strong willed joy entered our life. Her will so strong it helped her survive. In her 17 years she has had 1 tummy surgery, 1 back surgery, 3 heart surgeries, 2 heart caths, 3 angiograms, a large hemotoma that could have taken her life it was so large, 1 MRI (which she can't have anymore because of the rods in her back) at least 5 to 7 CAT scans, countless X-rays and many many months spent in the hospital. Each surgery different and having it's own risks. Each moment saying good-bye from my arms as a little baby to being wheeled away on a bed far to big for her, and at the last as a young woman knowing with such an assurance that whether in life or death God's will would be done and having peace that was beyond our understanding. Only with a tear flowing down her cheek as she watched us all try hold it together with each giving a kiss on her forehead as she went to the OR. That was a life time ago and at the same time only a little more than 2 years.
From PICU to the floor we have met many people along the way too that have impacted our life and hopefully we have made a little mark on theirs. I can't believe all of what we have been through and it seems so overwhelming and yet, the goodness in the middle of it all. If I could only put into words the feeling I get over each and every birthday of this young daughter of the King. And that is just what she is, a daughter of the King!! As much as I want to take credit for being her mom and helping her through life I can only say that it is only because of God's spirit in me, His love extended through my arms, and His grace that is wider, deeper, and bigger than we can wrap our brains around. At the point of her birth I was only familiar with a God that was "in control" but in the first months of Kasi's life He started to impact my heart in ways that would change me forever. Am I a crazy for the King, absolutely!! I have seen my King at work around us and through us. Would I change anything of the past 17years? Not if it means changing anything about who we are as a family. Does it mean we are perfect? No, it just means we are real, growing, and moving for the Kingdom and sometimes that means that what we face from day to day is a little harder, more challenging, or bringing us to a new place where we can see God is His awesomeness, moving, working, and being glorified. Even if it is new chapter or even a new book, which is what it seems to be with our family.
On April 16 Kasi will go in and see her cardiologist. We are expecting a good report although there are some questions, but when are there not questions? It's Kasi!!
Then on April 25 a first chapter in a new book starts. Although that is not all totally true because Ben has been brought to us in a way that only have been orchestrated by God Himself, but that my friends is a different book altogether! This new adventure we are facing with our Most High is about the brain and all it complexity. Only our creator knows our brain in ways that can be totally healed so that is what we always pray for, and as we are moving we pursue openings and discover ways to help our little man out to the best of our ability. With this comes an appointment at UofM on the 25th of April. He does have epilepsy and with the choices his birth mom made while he was in the womb he is a complicated case. We love this little guy and he is ours. We never look back as say because her bla bla bla, we just don't go there. She had/has her issues and this is not about her. God has placed him here as well as his brother because they were meant to be here. They are our own children and nothing can change that. And with that we move forward as we did and do with Kasi into this new part of learning and growing knowledge I never wanted or needed to know. We move forward because we know we can with the strength of Him who gives all strength. Ben is a child of God who asked Jesus into his heart while making cookies with me one day right by the counter in our kitchen. He loves Jesus and I know that Jesus will hold his hand as He did Kasi's. And I must say, Kasi is a blessing to him as well.
We are growing, and learning once again. So welcome to the next journey in faith with the DeRoo's. We still are on one with Kasi, just adding to it and not stopping God's story through us.
This is a fallen world that we live in, but...BUT we are citizens of the King's Kingdom!! Resting in the assurance of our eternal home and spreading seeds where ever He calls us.
Thy word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path.......we see only one step at a time by God's design
Looking Up!
Jodi
