Friday, October 29, 2010

Fundraiser

Here it is the 29th of October already.  It seems like just yesterday I was talking with my friend saying, "I don't know how we are going to make it with all of our bills when we won't be working.  And who knows what will be and won't be cover by insurance since we have had things denied before because it was unusual."  She just said to me, God will provide and I have stuck to that from that day on.  It wasn't until a few weeks later when she said to me, God woke me up in the middle of the night and basically said we need to have a fundraiser.  Well, most of you don't know this, but it started off with a brain storm on my deck thinking about what that would look like.  She really felt like it was supposed to be a 3 v 3 basketball tournament or something like that.  I said that sounded great, the name was even Dunkin' for the DeRoos.  Then if that didn't work she had a backup plan and that was going to be a soccer tournament and she would have called it, Kicking for Kasi.  As you all know neither one of those things happened.  Why?  Well, as I/we look back on it now, God's plans are MUCH bigger than we what we could think.  She told me about how she would just put an invite out to people who know us and see who would be on board with helping out.  To her surprise and mine, the list looks different that what we thought it would.  The people that are helping were "called" to help.  I am not kidding about that at all, they all thought "out-of-the-box" and had their ideas.  I kind of feel bad at times for the load of responsibility that was place on Kristie, but it wasn't because of the ideas and such, it was because God was working in many, many lives and moving people to give and step up with ideas. 
As I think about tonight and the fundraiser a few things come to mind.  One of them is the immense love we feel for all of those who have given time and resources to make this work.  Those who gave because they want to, not because they had to.  It is a joy-filled feeling to know that as many people that gave, there are more people praying!  This event has been covered in prayer this whole time and the evidence is huge.  I keep thinking on this night and thinking back to how it began to where it has now come, I know that God is pleased.  Not with the amount, but with the heart of those who helped, but even more, the Unity of God's people coming together and accomplishing something great that will ultimately bless His heart.  He is in control of everything happening tonight and my prayer is that someone will see Him and His great love for His people and want to become part of that!  That someone might have a seed planted, or hear of His goodness in the middle of struggle.  The peace He gives and the love that he shows is beyond what we could ever express. 
So, with all of this said, I just want to thank everyone with my whole heart!!  I want to do that now before the auction because I want people to know it is not about how much, it is about God providing for our every need.  We trust that and we see that!  We love you ALL!  Whether you are prayer warriors, attending tonight, or just a reader of this blog.  We are very supported by you all and we are blessed.
I will post more this weekend as we prepare for next week, but I really felt I needed to say this to you all!
Jodi

Saturday, October 23, 2010

12 days

First I want to tell all of you who are reading this for the first time, if you want to hear Kasi's whole "heart story" you have to go to the post title "the whole story".  If you want to piece together her back and her heart you will have to read the posts from December 2008 when I started the blog.

Here are 12 days out from a life-changing surgery for Kasi.  As it gets closer there is so much to do and so many thoughts going through my mind and heart.  I am taking time to prepare myself mentally and spiritually.  If eating means to stay strong physically, I do that well.  We are healthy eaters over here for more reasons than just her heart. 
The past week has been a journey of growth and discernment to say the least.  I have learned more about how God has grown me in His whole process of healing and man's view on healing.  I am excited in the fact that it was revealed to me by the Holy Spirit when something was a false teaching and I could stand up to it.  This is something I worked through, not just a sense.  It came with listening again to a message I heard on Sunday and sending it to a mentor who deals with these issues daily and has all of the teaching and theology classes to help me better understand.  I have to say I am humbled by the fact that God has chosen to use me in speaking Truth and at the same time, knowing He calls us all to speak Truth and stand up for the Truth.  The beginning of the week was filled with an uncertain heart not knowing if I had over stepped my bounds and if I was wrong in my thinking and feeling.  Wondering if I was too emotionally invested in something having been through, all kinds of teaching on healing desperate for answers, and now knowing what I have learned and thought to be true, is really Truth!  I have also recognized that this happened at a time in which Kasi's story is becoming well known to more and more people and the enemy was trying to distract me/us from God's work.  Well, great is HE that is in ME, than he who is in the world!  AMEN!!
Yesterday a reporter came over to talk with our family regarding the fundraiser that is being thrown for us.  I have to say, I think he walked away knowing too that Kasi is a special girl who knows and loves Jesus.  She is mature beyond her age that is for sure.  In fact he said I can see in your eyes that you are "old" or mature.  One question he asked her is if she wishes she could be "normal" or do "normal" things.  Kasi's response said a ton about her and life.  Kasi said that she sometimes sees other kids and wonders what it would be like, but she wouldn't change her life because it has made her who she is.  And she likes who she is.  As a mom I too was in awe at her view on life.  She was also asked about the risks involved in this surgery and she really hasn't thought about it, but more she focuses on the end.  Knowing that surgery will happen no matter what we look forward to the outcome.  We know God is in control of the outcome whether He chooses to heal her with a Dr.'s hands or if He chooses to reach in and touch her Himself.  We have seen both in our life.  We are preparing for this journey and spending time loving on each other and just being.  We will rejoice in the fact that we have each other and our family is an incredible gift of God.  He has brought us all together in great ways and we love each other with the love of a family, but even more with God's love that He has given us for each other. 
As the reporter ended he asked me what one thing would you like to say or make sure we get in this article.  It was this, pray.  Pray for strength, peace, healing, all of the things that get us through.  And that is what I ask all of you too.  Although my prayer is greater for all of you and that is to add to that list a prayer of open hearts and eyes for people to see God through all of this.  God is preparing hearts around us to see Him maybe for the first time.  May we be faithful in sharing His love and the Hope we have in Him to everyone around us.  It might be through the fundraiser, it might be at U of M.  Where ever, when ever, may we all be a light shining His face among us!
Love to you all!!
Jodi

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

my head aches....

Here we are 14 days from leaving to go to U of M and 15 days from life changing surgery.  No matter how I look at it Kasi's life as she knows it and our life as we know it will be changed forever.  I never thought 14 years ago that this would ever be an issue again.  I am in the middle of a struggle about healing and what is God's will.  What I think I have figured out, gets doubted by people who think that God's healing comes about because of something we do or don't do.  My struggle  is not in the fact of whether or not God heals, because I know he does.  My struggle comes from the fact that people try to put man's work into the middle of God's divine healing or purpose.  What I mean is, there are people who think there might be a sin issue to block healing or a miracle. 
Here is my thought, feeling, and belief.  God and God alone heals.  God's ways are not man's way, nor His thoughts our thoughts.  He is bigger than our biggest imagination so when it comes to healing and miracles, yes I do believe in them.  I have seen them.  I also know that he has a perfect path for us and that whatever the path is, we need to honor Him as we go down it.  I believe prayer is a power tool we have for sharing our heart felt expression and all of our groaning we know God hears and understands because the Spirit intercedes for us.  I am totally committed to praying, and looking for God's work among us.  For sharing Him with everyone we come into contact with, and to encourage those who don't have the Hope we do.
My head aches with all of the other "stuff" people are talking about and right now, I can't go there.  I do not have anything to do with Kasi's healing, I do not have a "block" and neither does Kasi.  We are ultimately God servants.  Called to a purpose, and that is to love. 
We will love all along the way.  We will love God, each other, and people who we come into contact with. I hope and pray I represent God well and one day He will see me and say "well done, good and faithful servant".   And I am pretty sure He won't say "if only". 
So, here we go, two weeks away and we need to be upheld in prayer.  For people not to distract us from being God instruments or give us any doubt.  We never doubt God and we don't want to ever put any doubt in our life of who we are.  We are God's workmanship! 
Thanks to all of you who pray for us daily.  We need wisdom in the next couple of weeks as we move closer to the surgery date.  Pray for wisdom for Dr. Stanley who has done only similar things as this.  Pray for Kasi's body to be healed, either by a miracle, or by a surgeons hands.  Pray that God will be seen through our life and that we may be a testimony to God's goodness.
Jodi

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

One Month to go.....

Here it is Oct. 5 and I can't help but think how our lives will change in the next month.  In one month Kasi will have had her surgery and will start her long road to recovery.  Also, a lot will be happening in the month of Oct to prepare for Nov. 4.  All of the "things" are good, but a reminder too of what is yet to come. 
As we get ready for people to move in and out of here, Ron changing his hours to be home for the boys, and me living 2.5 hours away nursing Kasi back to a new "normal" a lot of emotional "stuff" is being dealt with.  For instant, Ben said to me on Saturday, "Mom I really love Kasi."  He continued on and said he really wants to love her forever, and I told him he could, kind of confused by where he was going with this.  Well, he then told me that he didn't want Kasi to die in surgery.  Ok, this boy has a 6th sense because we NEVER talk about that in those words.  We have said there are risks but never to that detail with Ben or anyone else for that matter.  I do believe I talked to Kasi once this summer while camping and Aubree once while in the van on the way home from soccer, but not in front of him.  So, that just breaks my heart that his little mind is getting stressed over that.  I of course talked to him in a non-threatening way about death and how when someone knows Jesus they never really die, but go "home" and we just get sad because it is going a while before we see each other.  I also said that God is in control and whatever He has planned for our family is perfect in His way, not always ours.  That is because we don't see His big picture.
God's big picture now is being revealed in and through so many through this fundraiser.  I know people get excited about donations, but I get excited about all those who are joining us in prayer.  You see the more people that know, the more people that pray.  I have said before, but some of your are new to this blog so I will say it again, I want it sooo loud before the throne of God with everyone pleading on Kasi's behalf.   He loves her more than anyone of us ever could and that is such a blessing.  How it must bless His heart to see those praying for her too.  The love for her, His child, is over whelming to me.  I have been blessed to call her my daughter, but really on loan for a moment here on earth.  Her work for God is her own and I must say, she has done an incredible job showing the Grace to others that God has extended to her.  It humbles me to watch and learn from her. 
I know in this last month before surgery that reality is going to start hitting her too.  I know that her heart will start feeling the anticipation of a huge change in her life.  She will need an extra measure of peace from the only One who can give it.   And all of us too as we face being strength for her and the other kids.  I too need prayers for the time to get everything done and wisdom for what is best for the kiddos while we are at U of M.  Pray for their hearts and ours as a family as we anticipate being apart for a while.  Pray for our eyes to see the beauty of God's work instead of being distracted by "stuff" that we will see and have to be in the middle of. 
I thank you all for your prayers and support!  We are extremely blessed to have you all!!
Love,
Jodi

PS...if you are new to the blog and want Kasi's full story check out the last blog post.