pondering and processing

With August being right around the corner it amazes me that 14 years ago in August was Kasi's last major heart surgery. She was in the hospital for a few months and she was just not thriving anymore so the Dr.'s had to do something to help her. Her narrowed aorta and collateral's that she had grown were not bringing enough blood flow to her lower body and her upper body had extremely high pressure that was getting out of control. She was on every kind of medicine and it just wasn't helping her any longer. She was in extreme congestive heart failure. The only solution was to go in and repair her narrowed aorta, but they really didn't know how. 3 very smart Dr.'s went in and actually rebuilt her aorta with her own tissue because they used the collateral that her body had built. This repair was and still is amazing. Never had something like that been done on such a young baby. I am talking NEVER. So amazing is all of that, but what else is amazing is that this whole case was written up in one of the most well known medical journals.
Now here we are 14 years later walking into a room of Dr. Stanley, who is the best of the best in the world when dealing with these type of issues. He is why U of M is known for their pediatric cardiothorasic surgery. And not only that only 1 of 2 in this nation that would have a clue in Kasi's case. Dr. Stanley walked into the room and looked at Kasi and said "I know your insides better than you". We all looked a little puzzled, but he explained that he has been following her case ever since she was a baby. He was so intrigued with it because it was his specialty and it had never been done on someone so little. And now 14 year later we are sitting in his office intent on what he has to say about her aorta issues.
It has been a week since my last conversation with Dr. Stanley. The last conversation leaving room for remembering, and looking ahead. What they found in the heart cath/angiogram, was two narrowings. The normal coarctation would be hour-glass shaped, so wide to a narrowed spot and then wide again. Kasi's narrowing, coarctation, is much different than that. Her first narrowing indents a little bit right after her aortic arch and then stays narrow through her diaphram to a second narrowing which narrows and stays narrow again. In order to fix this Dr. Stanley will have to open her aorta up the whole narrowed part, and then put a patch on her aorta. This means she will have an incision down her chest and across it as well. She will have to go on a bi-pass machine because of the length of time the surgery will take. They will slowly let the blood flow back into her aorta and make sure there are no leaks, and then they will close. She will be in the hospital at U of M for a week and a half to two weeks. Before she leaves she will have to have another heart cath done to double check how her blood flow is and check her pressure. She will then have 6 weeks at home for recovery and then go back to school 1/2 days.
Now to the part that I am pondering and processing. All of this "stuff" I just wrote about is very factual and doesn't show my heart in things. That is not the reason for this blog. This is a Journey in Faith and that is what I ponder and process. God has been calling me to read and re-read the story of Rack, Shack, and Benny....okay for all of you who don't watch veggie tales, it is Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednago. (no comment on spelling because I am not going to look it up right now) I have been pondering parts of this that have brought me to different places. First when I read it I think, wow, God calls us to this type of Faith in every part of our lives. And yes I am not about to get dumped into a firey furnace, phew. Or am I? Are we? Not a physical furnace, but a place where we could loose a life as we know it. Yes, process that. So I read on, and I see that not only were they prepare to go in the furnace for their Faith they went in saying, If God's saves us that is His will and if He doesn't they were still not ever going to serve any other god but the only One True God. Hmmmmm....more pondering. I have to remember that yes, Dr. Stanley is the best of the best, but if it is God's will for her to be saved He will save her, and if it is not His will, I will praise Him for freeing her completely. Yes, I write that with tears in my eyes, but the truth is our time on this earth is so very short compared to eternity. And Kasi loves God more than anything, her faith is amazing! So, I read on, and in the middle of the firey furnace, when it is 7 times hotter than normal, who is with them. Jesus. And that my friends is the peace that can transend all understanding.
Yes, we are looking ahead and praying for miracles to happen in this little ladies life. I believe in miracles!! I also know that our God is Sovereign. He is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow, so in all of this I look at our yesterday even if it was 14 years ago. He changed my life then and is still growing me up in Him. I praise Him for Kasi and for the refining fire we have been through together. She has felt the hand of God is ways most people will never know until the actually see Him face to face. She has held Jesus hand as she fell asleep as a young child. (I know this because she told me to move) She has felt His presence on her in the middle of an MRI going way wrong and His peace laid on her. And when she was in kindergarten, I would ask who she played with and sometime she would just say "Jesus". Yep, and that God is the same God we turn to now. He loves her more than I could ever imagine loving a person. He holds her when I can not, and even tells me to move out of the way. Kasi is God's child, and in that we trust.
I will write more later, I just had to get this one out :-)
I will leave you with this verse that Kasi always claimed as a child.
"My heart and flesh may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever"
Ps 73:26
Jodi


I love the fact that people pray for us. This is not our journey alone, but to be shared with all of you the body of Christ! May He bless you too in ways that you know can only be from Him!